TEDxDelft – Serious Business

On 27 September 2012 by Carolien Geurtsen

Stop smoking maybe, but never give up good sex

What makes you feel more content with life, yourself, others, through a smile, or a glimpse even of excitement and joy. What makes you come out and play?

Ever heard of the Inner Child approach?  Its a quite common concept in both traditional and popular psychology, and in loads of workshops and training programs I used to either follow or give in the past.
Lately there’s been a lot of puking and joking about it, and for that reason some people don’t dare or want to use it anymore, the allergic x-factor, as it happens with nearly anything which goes through the cycles of time.

According to Wiki:
Inner child is a concept used in popular psychology and Analytical psychology to denote the childlike aspect of a person’s psyche, especially when viewed as an independent entity”

When I use it these days it tends to be in the order of: I want to tickle my Inner Child a bit cause there was not enough fun lately, and please give us a break of reading or watching horrid news on either TV or the net.

How I tickle my inner child is by doing things which I like, initially without any other purpose than that  ~ playing for the playing itself, as children hopefully do.
In the past my Inner Adult really really really got in the way a lot, cause she likes really really really to save the world, improve all which is not working efficiently and help out where-ever there is need. And surprisingly, need never ends.

Years and years my eyebrows were somewhere rocket-high in the sky when people asked me about my hobbies. When I had to fill in some kind of form with that question, I used to make something up, like swimming or biking, or reading.
O, I did swim, or biked and even read a large amount of books, but hardly for fun, nearly always for a Purpose. And being now on the flip side of a burn-out, (I love the metaphor of hanging in the comet’s tail which name is BO), it is at last sound and clear to me that I should spend a large amount of my time making my Inner Child happy or I won’t make it through another year without loosing my sanity, or at least my common since.
And this I love, cause my common sense used to think she could work 23/7 because I had such great work, a wonderful little company, mainly interesting and witty clients, with loads of dancing and singing (literally) and even a theatrical part ( I used to give improvisation lessons to musicians who got stuck in technique).
But although it was fun fun fun, it was always for a purpose, for others, to improve quality of life, work, etc for my students, pupils, clients. And same in the private life: aiming for being the perfect mother, wonderful wife, great lover ( which I was and am by the way). Now there is my Wise Guy talking, who sees her chance every once in a while. She ís speaking the truth, and coming from past with a date-rape, that truly is a victory and a pleasure. And that’s all of us talking.

Writing I do love, I started a huge amount of diaries, stopped many, and managed to fill some till the last page.
I started writing down my dreams, or at least the ones I remembered, when I was about twenty, and have about one meter of notebooks with them on the top shelf, and now I do blogs. Every day one, mainly in Dutch, the coming two weeks mostly in English.
But there is always the trap of the Purpose. For sure with blogs cause they have to make some kind of sense, at least be readable for one person and that is the one who starts reading.
These days I am doing a lot of free writing, but there is a catch there as well, the one to make me feel better. But hey, I think that is okay.
But here is always the trap that I get too entangled in my thoughts, my common sense, my head.
And if there is one thing I want to get rid off, it is My Inner Schoolmaster. I won’t even begin to explain what she is thinking. Especially about all the above mentioned Bull.

So thank God for Photography.
That’s my hobby.
I have decided.
I don’t now when, somewhere along the way of the BO that’s for sure.

There was this moment of epiphany – I love that word, never can get it right, so had to look it up in Wiki – I was sitting  in the car next to my father. We were driving back from Austria last April, loads of snow on the way, and I was shooting pictures of about anything which catched my eye.
He asked me: whát on earth are you going to do with all those pictures?
I said: I don’t know, maybe nothing.
“Then why the hell are you shooting them?”
I said: Because I like it, and my therapist (which I was visiting those days) said “Now was the time to do only things that I like, without any other  purpose than that”.
And then it struck me, at last at last, my eureka, I was playing again, because of the playing, no more, no less. At last, taking my own medicine, walking my talk.

My Inner Child is extremely happy that we will go and play on TEDxDelft next week. With one of the most adorable Inner Child experts I know, Aldith Hunkar. Although she probably will nog reckognize herself as such 😉
She will be the host of the event, and I am allowed to play house,

take care that she eats and drinks in time
#organisation, so she can fully concentrate on introducing the ump 30 speakers/performers on the 5th of October in the Aula of TU Delft.
And I will make pictures. And blog. No serous business, just backstage stuff. Yes.
Me happy.  Never Grow Up.

Wiki on Inner Child |TEDxDelft | Epiphany |Free Writing | Aldith Hunkar |Blogs in English

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